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EspañolWhat happens if I have joint custody with the other parent but we can’t agree about a major life decision?
If the parents cannot reach an agreement about a major life decision, they have several ways to resolve the dispute. The parents can decide major life decisions by:
- using counseling or mediation services;
- having an arbitrator make a final, binding decision;
- deciding that only one parent will have decision-making authority over a particular major decision area;
- ending joint custody and giving one parent sole custody;
- referring the dispute to a court master; or
- filing an action with the district court.1
1 N.M. Stat. § 40-4-9.1(J)(5)
If a custody order is already in place, how can I get it changed?
If you have a final custody order already in place, you can petition the judge to make changes to it (modify it) only if there has been a substantial change in circumstances since the custody order was issued. The judge may modify the custody order if, based on these new circumstances, s/he feels that the modification would be in the child’s best interests.1
1 N.M. Stat. § 40-4-9.1(A)
Can I change the state where the case is being heard?
If you move to another state, you may be able to change the state where the custody case is being heard. You will have to file a motion in court to ask the judge who is hearing the case to change the state where your case is being heard (which may be called a motion for a change of venue). The judge may do so if:
- the child and both parents no longer live in New Mexico; or
- if the child and one parent no longer live in New Mexico and substantial evidence is no longer available in New Mexico concerning the child’s care, protection, training, and personal relationships.1
For more information on modifying a custody order from a different state, go to the Changing a final custody order section on our General Custody page.
This is often complicated and, as with all custody issues, we recommend that you talk to a lawyer about this. To find a lawyer in your area, please visit the NM Finding a Lawyer page.
1 N.M. Stat. § 40-10A-202(a)
If there is a final custody order in place, can I take my kids out of the state?
Generally, a parent can take his/her kids out of the state for a brief trip as long as there is no order prohibiting it and so long as it does not interfere with the other parent’s visitation rights. However, if you are uncertain whether a planned trip may violate your custody order, please consult with a lawyer before leaving.
Moving out of state, however, is a different story. When the parents have joint custody, and one of them wants to move out of state, the moving parent has to give the other parent 30 days’ written notice. The notice must state when the parent is going to move and where they are moving. If the other parent does not agree with the move, s/he may be able to file a petition with the court that issued the original order to ask that the other parent not be allowed to move, especially if the parent that is moving is the custodial parent.1
New Mexico law provides a process for parents with joint custody to resolve disagreements about major life decisions, like moving to another state. As explained in What happens if I have joint custody with the other parent but we can’t agree about a major life decision?, parents can decide major life decisions by:
- agreement between the parties;
- using counseling or mediation services;
- having an arbitrator make a final, binding decision;
- deciding that only one parent or the other will have decision-making authority over that particular major decision area;
- ending joint custody and giving one parent sole custody;
- referring the dispute to a court master; or
- filing an action with the district court.2
1 N.M. Stat. § 40-4-9.1(J)(4)(a)
2 N.M. Stat. § 40-4-9.1(J)(5)
What can I do if the other parent took the kids out of state without my permission?
This is a very complicated legal question and it depends on a lot of factors, including if it was a temporary trip or if it is a permanent relocation and if it interferes with the terms of the custody order. You can see the criminal statute on custodial interference in New Mexico and our general Parental Kidnapping page for some basic information. However, to find out what may be best in your situation, please go to NM Finding a Lawyer to seek out legal advice.
What happens if there is a custody order made within a protection order, and the protection order expires?
A domestic violence protection order granted by a court in New Mexico that awards custody and visitation (or support) is effective for a fixed term of six months. This term can be extended for another six months if the protected party (the petitioner) shows good cause for the extension. When the protection order expires, the custody provisions also expire.1
If you currently have temporary custody through a protection order, you may want to talk to a lawyer about filing for custody so that you have a long-term custody order. You can find information about free and paid lawyers on our NM Finding a Lawyer page.
1 N.M. Stat. § 40-13-6(C)
