Abuser is in Law Enforcement

If you are thinking of ending an abusive relationship, you should know that the abuser might get even more violent. That’s why it’s important to think about how to stay safe in your situation. Making a plan to protect yourself from the abuser is called “safety planning.” Here are some things you may want to do, especially if the abuser is a law enforcement officer:

• Contact a domestic violence organization and ask an advocate to help you make a safety plan. These organizations may also provide support, shelter, counseling, legal referrals, or other services.
• Keep a log where you write down each incident of abuse, and keep copies of any messages from the abuser that contain threats or show anger. Save or print out photos you may have that show injuries or items destroyed by the abuser. Keep everything someplace secure that the abuser does not know about, like in a safe deposit box.
• In that same safe place, you can also keep important papers you might need if you leave, like passports, your children’s birth certificates, insurance papers, and money if you can.
• Try to make friends or connections outside of the law enforcement world, so you have people who can help you and aren’t connected to the abuser.¹

Not all of these suggestions will work for everyone, and some could even place you in greater danger. You have to do what you think is best to keep yourself and your children safe. In some circumstances, a restraining order may be part of a safety plan, including restricting access to firearms when the abuser in law enforcement is not on duty.  

¹ Adapted from When your abuser is a police officer, Domesticviolenceshelters.org (2015)