Divorce

Is there any chance that your husband will agree to you moving and be willing to work out some type of visitation/custody arrangement. If so, that is your best bet. If not, whether or not you can move with the children will likely depend on how far you want to move and what the father’s visitation schedule is more so than if you have sole or joint legal custody.

If the father does not agree to your move, and you are moving somewhere far where he cannot easily see his children, you would likely have to ask for permission from the judge to relocate when applying for custody. Getting this permission from court might be difficult especially if it would affect the father’s visitation rights. For example, if he wants the right to take the kids to dinner on Wednesdays but now you want to move 3 hours away, it doesn’t seem possible that the father would be expected to drive 6 hours round trip to take them to dinner. But if you move to a neighboring state and he can still agree to a visitation schedule without having to drive a very long way to see the kids (for example, if he has alternate weekends only), this might increase the chances that you would be able to move. Perhaps you may have to be the one who has to drive the children to him each way.

A lot of times in a divorce, a custody agreement is negotiated between the parties. So perhaps you may agree to joint custody if he agrees to let you move. If you both can’t agree, it would go to trial and the judge would decide. You would likely have to prove to the judge that moving is in the children’s best interest and that the father’s visitation can be arranged so that he does not miss out on time with his children (for example, perhaps the father would get them for the whole summer to make up for time he’d miss if you moved).

I strongly suggest you talk to a lawyer first before filing in court (and even perhaps before approaching your husband with the idea) to see what the realistic possibility is that you will be able to move. Here are links to lawyers both free and paid: LINK

If you leave without his agreement, during the first 6 months that you are in the new state, he can file for custody in your old state and you would have to return to that state for the court dates – then the judge might even rule that the child has to stay in the old state. Also, depending on your state’s laws about custodial interference (parental kidnapping), you might even run the risk of being charged with this if you take the child without his agreement. You would have to talk to a lawyer in your current state to find out more about whether or not this is a possibility.