Custody

Getting a court order can give you (or the other parent):

1. the legal right to make decisions about your child,
2. the right to have your child live with you, and/or
3. the right to visitation, or parent-child contact.

If there is no court order and you and the other parent were married, then you and the other parent have equal rights to have the child live with you and to make decisions about the child’s life. The only way to change the equal right to make decisions about your child and the equal right to have your child live with either parent is by filing for a court order addressing parental rights and responsibilities.

If you and the child’s father were not married, then only the mother has legal and physical responsibility for the child until parentage is established in court and there is a court order saying otherwise.*

Some people decide not to get an order because they don’t want to get the courts involved. They may think going to court will provoke the other parent or will allow the other parent to receive more time with their child. They may also have an informal agreement that works well for them. However, you should also know that the police and the courts cannot enforce an informal agreement about custody. They can only enforce a court order. If you and the other parent agree about how to divide PR&R, you can ask a court to turn that agreement into a court order so that is is legally enforceable.

*See VT ST 15 § 308; and Vermont Judiciary website