Support

There may be many reasons that a victim of abuse does not want to admit that s/he is abused or may not identify as someone who is the victim of abuse. A victim may have fear of the abuser but still love the abuser, may be ashamed or not want others to know what the victim and his/her children are dealing with, and many other reasons. An important step that a loved one can take is to inform him/herself about domestic abuse and the possible ways to get help, in the hope that when the victim is ready, s/he can pass along the information. First, here is a page on our website about ways to help a friend or family member who is abused.

You can also look at our information page on domestic violence and a checklist of signs of abuse that may be less obvious than physical abuse on our website. Here is a list of different pages on our website that describe different forms of abuse. We also have information on our website about making a safety plan to keep as safe as possible before, during, or after leaving. Even if the victim is not ready to hear this information, it can still be helpful to share with them that this information is available when they are ready.

One of the most unfortunate side-effects of domestic violence is that victims often feel extremely isolated. It often helps victims to feel connected to loved ones and friends, and that those people continue to support the victim even if they decide they are not yet ready to leave. 

When she is ready, a local domestic violence program may also be able to assist her with counseling, linking her up with resources in her community, and helping her find safe shelter. You can find Local Programs on our website. 

For information on what type of help the legal system can provide, we have information on getting a restraining order, and information on crimes an abuser may commit (physical abuse, stalking, harassment, and similar crimes) on our Legal Information pages.