Restraining Orders

NOTE - THE FIRST TWO PARAGRAPHS ARE THE SAME LANGUAGE FROM “ROs ONLY GO ONE WAY, INFO FOR V” - YOU CAN INCLUDE THIS IF SHE ASKS IF SHE IS ALLOWED TO CONTACT THE A. IF SHE IS JUST ASKING WHAT TO DO TO BE ABLE TO CONTACT HIM, YOU PROBABLY DON’T NEED THE FIRST TWO PARAGRAPHS

Although I cannot speak to the specific situation that you are asking about, I can tell you that in general, restraining orders usually only go “one way,” which means that the order generally only applies to the respondent’s behavior, not the petitioner’s. For example, if the order says “no contact,” generally, only the respondent is ordered not to contact the victim, not the other way around. It is generally the responsibility of the respondent, not the petitioner, to stay within the bounds of the order. A petitioner generally cannot violate his or his/her own order of protection although there may be exceptions to this general rule. In some states, for example, a protected person can be held criminally responsible for aiding in a violation by, for example, communicating with a respondent who has a “no contact” clause against him/her - although this is a very rare occurrence. I am not sure what STATE’s law says about this but you may be able to make a quick call to your local legal services office to find out.

However, even if a petitioner’s behavior wouldn’t “violate” the order or make the order void, disregarding the terms of the order may make it harder for the petitioner to get any future violations of the order to be taken seriously by police and prosecutors. Also, if a petitioner has a temporary order and s/he plans on returning to court to get a final order (if that is the procedure in the petitioner’s state), the respondent may be able to use the petitioner’s behavior against him/her in court and the judge may deny the petitioner the final order. The respondent’s attorney may use the fact that a victim is in contact with a respondent to the respondent’s advantage at trial to prove that the petitioner is not in fear of the respondent or even to prove that the petitioner falsely filed for an order. It is, therefore, generally important for a petitioner to tell his/her attorney about any and all contact prior to being in court (if there is an upcoming court date) so that the attorney is prepared to handle it if this comes up in court. If you want legal advice, here is a link for lawyers, some of which may be free or low-cost: LINK and here is more information about restraining orders in STATE in case it is useful:LINK

In general, if a person has a no contact order but would like to change the order to allow for limited contact (regarding the children, for example), it may be possible for the person who has the order to file in court to ask to modify (change) the order to allow for the specified limited contact. However, often times, the petitioner may want to ask that contact only be allowed via text or email so that s/he has a record of the contact. This way, if the contact becomes abusive or threatening, or the contact is about situations that are not for the limited purpose specified in the court order, it may be easier for the petitioner to prove that the order was violated since there is a written record of it. If the contact is over the phone and it becomes abusive, it can be hard to prove what was said over the phone and the police may not be willing to arrest for violation of the order.