Restraining Orders

As you know, MPOs are issued by the commander. It could be possible to approach the commander to ask to drop it but it could be likely that command will be reluctant to drop it. Are you thinking about dropping it because the Family Advocacy Program is conducting a Case Review and you are worried about what they will recommend to command for the intervention into the domestic violence. And the impact it might have on your husband’s career. I know this is sometimes a reason that someone seeks to drop MPO – because people that the next steps for her, the offender and the family are now out of their hands.

One idea is to sit down with your Victim Advocate who has the right to keep things confidential from command and others involved in Case Review process and discuss thoughtfully with them what and why you are thinking of asking the order be removed. If you don’t feel comfortable with the Victim Advocate provided by the military, you could seek out an advocate in local dv program to go over situation with carefully before trying to stop the MPO process. Here is a link for local non-military domestic violence organizations:LINK

Please remember that if you are thinking of dropping the order because he has not been bothering you lately, please think about that fact that he likely isn’t bothering you because he is fearful of violating the order and being arrested. Many men abuse their partners even after they’ve “promised not to” or after they swear that they have “changed.” Once you drop the order, there is nothing to stop him from re-starting the abuse that caused you to get the order in the first place. If you get rid of your order, you will lose all of the protection that your order gives you. Even if you keep the order but ask the command to change the terms so that he can contact you (if that is what you want), you may be at risk of threats and harassment.

If you decide that changing or dropping your order is right for you, it is often a good idea to plan ahead in case he does try to harm you. We have safety planning tips available on our website at http://www.womenslaw.org/simple.php?sitemap_id=3,and your local domestic violence organization can help you find resources in the event of emergency in your community.

You can read more about MPOs on our website here:http://www.womenslaw.org/laws_state_type.php?id=10866&state_code=US