Court Procedures / Evidence / Service

In terms of serving someone whose whereabouts are unknown, the actual process for doing this – and whether or not it’s possible– may depend on the state laws regarding service and what the judge allows. Depending on the state, there may be different ways that custody papers are served. If they are served through the mail, for example, and a petitioner tells the judge that s/he doesn’t have a current address for the other parent, sometimes a judge may allow a person to send it to the other parent’s last known address in order to see if the mail is forwarded to the person’s new address. Other times, a judge may allow the petitioner to mail it to the other parent’s closest relative or to his/her workplace if those addresses are known if the judge determines that this would actually get the papers to the parent being served. Or other times, a judge may not allow any sort of alternate service and the parent may not be permitted to continue with a petition for custody until s/he is able to get the person served in person or through certified mail – again, a lot of this may depend on the state’s rules for how custody petitions have to be served.

In general, if a state laws says that custody papers have to be served in person, perhaps there could be a possibility that the other parent can be served at another location aside from his/her home address. For example, it may be possible to serve someone where s/he works, a family member’s house, or somewhere he/she “hangs out” or goes to regularly. Additionally, if the person trying to serve the papers has friend in common with the other parent, or is in touch with any of the other parent’s relatives, the person looking to serve the papers may decide to ask if the friends or relatives know how to find the other parent or even if they may serve the custody papers, if that is permitted by law. However, these type of actions may not be safe - in situations of domestic abuse or when there is a history of domestic violence, it may not be safe for a person looking to serve papers to begin to track down the other parent through his her friends, family, etc.

Again, I am sorry that we do not have information on our website about how custody papers are to be served in STATE. However, hopefully a lawyer can clarify this for you – or perhaps you may even be able to find out from the court clerk. You can find courthouse contact information on our website [HYPERLINK], and also information to find free and low cost lawyers in your state. [HYPERLINK]

Another thing to discuss with an attorney can be the pros and cons of filing for custody versus not filing. Often if the other parent is not involved in a child’s life, filing for custody may sometimes increase involvement or end up with the other parent having more legal custodial rights than s/he may have had previously. We have information about the custody laws in STATE on our website. [HYPERLINK]

Sometimes, if a parent files for custody and the other parent is not served by the next court date, it is possible that a person may be able to ask the judge to extend the time to serve the defendant. However, in asking for more time, a person may generally have to give a detailed account of what the person has done so far to serve the other parent. For example, the person trying to serve the other parent may write down the time, date, and actions he/she took each time he/she tried to perform service. Again, I’m not sure if this would apply in your situation, however a lawyer in your state may be able to clarify this for you.